Consider the Lilies...

This morning I woke up and was greeted by an all too familiar visitor, worry.

It came upon me pretty unexpectedly, like those beautiful sunshiny days in summer when out of nowhere it begins pouring down rain. That is my favorite kind of rain; that kind of surprise is welcomed and enjoyed, like an old friend. Anxiety and worry, on the other hand, are more like old enemies beating down my door in the middle of the night. Unwelcome, and unwanted.

It's silly though...if they are so unwelcome, why do I constantly allow them a resting place in my heart and mind? Throughout all of my life that I can remember, these have been constant acquaintances. Even more, they've become the worst kind of close friend. They are always right there, waiting for one weak moment or stray thought to open the door and let them in to overtake my thoughts. 1 Corinthians 14:33 says "God is not a God of confusion, but of peace." These are definitely not peaceful thoughts, so I know that they come from the enemy. I try to "take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ"(2 Corinthians 10:5), and to "set [my] mind on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God" (Colossians 3:2). But often times, my flesh is stronger than my spirit, and I don't do this well.

So this morning worry and anxiety came in once again, and made themselves comfortable in my heart and mind- so much so that I couldn't really focus on anything other than my concerns. Of course I fueled them by checking the bank account one more time, working numbers in my head, and allowing myself to stray even further from focusing on the things of the Lord. Then I heard his voice loud and clear, convicting me of my sinfulness. I am a woman of little faith; I worry and fret, and don't trust the Lord. And how silly is this? God- the Creator of the Universe, who upholds the entire universe together by the word of his power (Heb 1:3)- I can't trust this God? How could I trust anyone else besides Him? He should be the One who is easiest to trust; He is most trustworthy. Every human around me will fail, as we are weakened by sinful nature. But He is everlasting, and perfect. And I don't trust him? Further proof of my sinful nature.

So this morning I went through and studied Scriptures that speak into worry and anxiety, and came again to a passage that I've visited many times, Matthew 6:25-34. It's neat how you can read something repeatedly, and each time something different stands out. This morning, it was this phrase "Do not be anxious." You probably think, "How could that not have stood out to her before? That's what the whole passage is about, that's what the little passage is titled by the translators...'Do Not Anxious.' Duh, it's everywhere." Well, that is all true. But this morning it was this realization: this isn't a suggestion, it's a command. I am confident that as believers we often relegate commands of Jesus to suggestions or individual callings, and for the first time I saw this in me in reference to this passage. Sure, Jesus says "do not be anxious," but I just can't help it! Just let me worry for a little bit, a few days, and then I'll really give it over to the Lord and let Him have His way.

Huh??

Jesus says "Do not be anxious." Does he leave any room for possibility, exceptions, excuses? Nope. He says "Do not be anxious." Even more, he says it 3 times in this passage. As you probably know, numbers are a big thing in the bible. Numbers have significance. What does 3 signify? Divine perfection or fullness. The fullness of God. Pointing to all the fullness of God, Jesus says 3 times "Do not be anxious." Seems like I should pay attention. Jesus goes on to tell us to look at the birds; they don't do anything to "merit" His provision or care, they don't even work! But God feeds them, provides for them, and cares for them. Aren't we more valuable than birds? He says look at the lilies; even Solomon, the greatest and wealthiest king of all time wasn't as beautiful as they. If God so clothes and makes so beautiful lilies (and he does, just look at this picture of some my wonderful husband got me this week), when they are here today and gone tomorrow, how much more will he clothe you and provide for you? Oh you of little faith. Oh me of little faith.

Jesus says don't be anxious, seek first His kingdom and righteousness. I say with my lips that I believe that bottom line, God is ultimately concerned for His glory, but my lack of faith contradicts that. Jesus says seek first God's Kingdom, righteousness- His glory- and all these things (clothes, food, etc.) will be added to me. So let's refocus, Chas. Seek first His glory. His renown. And guess what Jesus says in a similar passage in Luke? After encouraging us again to not worry and to consider the lilies, Jesus says "Fear not, little flock, for it is your Father's good pleasure to give you the Kingdom" (Luke 12:32). Woah! So Jesus says "don't worry, seek my kingdom, and all these things will be added to you. Oh, and it's God's pleasure to give you the Kingdom. He's ready and eager to give you the Kingdom, so seek it." Jesus pretty much guarantees that these things will be added to us because he guarantees that if we seek the Kingdom God will give it to us; it is His good pleasure to give it to us!

I could say here how insane it is that the One God desires to give us His Kingdom. I mean, it is. But how sweet is that promise? Jesus says seek the Kingdom, and God promises to give it. So, God promises to "add these things" to us. God promises to provide and care for us. He says "Do not be anxious, I will take care of you. I take care of birds and flowers, and you are mine. Made in My image. My treasured possession; I gave my Son as a ransom for you. I will take care of you. Trust me."

This God gave of Himself for me. I can trust this God. What else do I have? "You are my Lord; apart from you I have no good thing" (Psalm 16:2). What good is financial security, a house, even a fridge full of food, if I don't have the Lord? Just another vain pursuit, more vanity, mere chasing after wind.

Paul says to not be anxious, but in everything by prayer and supplication present our requests to God and His peace, which passes all understanding, will guard our hearts and minds in Christ (Phil 4:6-7). Paul says PRAY. And Jesus' peace will guard you. So this is it. Why do I worry? Why do I fret? I am not praying. I am not seeking His Kingdom first by praying to Him about anything and everything. Insert plug for an awesome book on prayer that I've just read a couple of months ago "A Praying Life" by Paul Miller. Read it. After this morning, I will be re-reading that book again soon.

I am not praying; I am not using my most effective tool as a Christian soldier (Eph 6), so why am I so surprised that the enemy has full reign? Not only am I not praying, I am not remembering. I am not remembering the very nature of God. His nature is faithful. Trustworthy. The most quoted bible verse in the bible is this, Exodus 34:6-7, “The LORD, the LORD, a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness, keeping steadfast love for thousands, forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin..."

He is merciful and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness. Praise God for his mercy, because I daily sin against him by doubting Him. Praise God for his faithfulness, because He is faithful to provide. He has always been faithful to provide (how ungrateful I am!), and He cannot go against his character and nature. Lord, teach me to pray. Teach me to trust. In the words of the man whose son Jesus was healing from demon oppression, "Lord, I believe! Help my unbelief!"