This morning, there was frost on the grass. FROST!
I am very excited. This is my favoritest time of year. Ham and dressing. Sweet potato pie. Putting up the Christmas tree the day after Thanksgiving. Officially being able to listen to Christmas music. Charlie Brown Christmas. Hot Chocolate. White Christmas. Sweatpants and fuzzy socks. Peacoats. Scarves. Awkward family Christmases. Elf. It's a Wonderful Life. A Christmas Story (far too many times). THE Christmas Story (can never be heard too many times). My first iGO Christmas Party. Christmas Eve at Uncle Joe's. Being under a comfy blanky with my mom reading a good book. That smell outside...it just smells like Christmas. Pumpkin Sheet Cake. Awesome hymns at church. First Christmas with John. Last Christmas as a single woman!
Wowza!
Anyway, this post is simply dedicated to the truth that I LOVE THANKSGIVING AND CHRISTMAS!
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Monday, November 16, 2009
Retreat.
Yesterday and today we had our iGO staff retreat. All 14 of us made the long trek to the booming metropolis of Palmer, Texas. Population just under 2,000. But let's be honest, the real Palmer is like population 50 with about 7,000 bulls, steer, cows, and longhorns? I ask that in the form of a question because apparently I fail to realize the difference. Though Shu and Ky tried to explain it to me, I really don't think this is something I will lose sleep over. All I know is that the house/big house/really really big house that we stayed in had about 1,000 additional dead animals represented inside. Let's not go there. I suppose they felt they had to make up for the serious lack of catchable fish in the pond.
Praise the Lord for faithful and generous supporters who are gracious to lend us (one of) their home(s) so that we can get away and spend some quality time eating, talking, praying, eating, throwing the football, eating, making a fire, cooking smores (smore what?), eating, "Cheer"ing, did I mention eating? We also ate. Often.
In all seriousness, the last 24 hours was so fruitful. Not only cause we ate lots of fresh fruit, which did happen. I told you we ate, right? Not only was it refreshing to get away in the middle of nowhere with a gorgeous home and beautiful view, it was so good to fellowship with other staff members, to get to know them on a deeper level, to vision cast for the future of iGO, to talk about what's missing, what's going well, to pray for one another, and to just be reminded and humbled at the fact that we even get to be a tiny part of this far greater thing that the Lord is doing...reaching the nations for His glory. Wow! On a personal level it was just refreshing for me to get away, be in a new place, and be forced to be a little more intentional with listening to the still, soft voice of the Father. This morning, praise Jesus, was one of the sweetest times I have had in the Word in a long time. Some would say I got my batteries recharged, others might say the Lord gave me a swift kick in the bottom, I would say...all of the above.
I'm at this place where I am questioning where I am gifted and why I am gifted and how that plays into this ministry that the Lord has called me to and burdened me for. How the heck am I gifted? I don't feel gifted in evangelism, which is funny, cause I work for a missions agency. I don't know if I am gifted in teaching, because I don't get to do it often enough to hone the skill even if I did have it. I mean, I've done spiritual gifts surveys and all that, but I just don't know how accurate those are played out in real life. I guess it's just that I have the desire to recognize where the Father has gifted me and how that fits in with what I could be doing at iGO, and how the Father will (hopefully) use me in future ministry at whatever church He calls John and I to.
I also really really really really really really wanna go to grad school/feel called to grad school but my logical mind is just going crazy over this and I have no clue what to do about that or what it would look like.
Oh well.
One day at a time, Lord.
PS- Sharpie pens are my new favorite. I mean, wow.
Praise the Lord for faithful and generous supporters who are gracious to lend us (one of) their home(s) so that we can get away and spend some quality time eating, talking, praying, eating, throwing the football, eating, making a fire, cooking smores (smore what?), eating, "Cheer"ing, did I mention eating? We also ate. Often.
In all seriousness, the last 24 hours was so fruitful. Not only cause we ate lots of fresh fruit, which did happen. I told you we ate, right? Not only was it refreshing to get away in the middle of nowhere with a gorgeous home and beautiful view, it was so good to fellowship with other staff members, to get to know them on a deeper level, to vision cast for the future of iGO, to talk about what's missing, what's going well, to pray for one another, and to just be reminded and humbled at the fact that we even get to be a tiny part of this far greater thing that the Lord is doing...reaching the nations for His glory. Wow! On a personal level it was just refreshing for me to get away, be in a new place, and be forced to be a little more intentional with listening to the still, soft voice of the Father. This morning, praise Jesus, was one of the sweetest times I have had in the Word in a long time. Some would say I got my batteries recharged, others might say the Lord gave me a swift kick in the bottom, I would say...all of the above.
I'm at this place where I am questioning where I am gifted and why I am gifted and how that plays into this ministry that the Lord has called me to and burdened me for. How the heck am I gifted? I don't feel gifted in evangelism, which is funny, cause I work for a missions agency. I don't know if I am gifted in teaching, because I don't get to do it often enough to hone the skill even if I did have it. I mean, I've done spiritual gifts surveys and all that, but I just don't know how accurate those are played out in real life. I guess it's just that I have the desire to recognize where the Father has gifted me and how that fits in with what I could be doing at iGO, and how the Father will (hopefully) use me in future ministry at whatever church He calls John and I to.
I also really really really really really really wanna go to grad school/feel called to grad school but my logical mind is just going crazy over this and I have no clue what to do about that or what it would look like.
Oh well.
One day at a time, Lord.
PS- Sharpie pens are my new favorite. I mean, wow.
Friday, November 13, 2009
Something's Missing.
It may be the fact that it has now been over six months since I have graduated college and taken classes, or possibly because I have had less and less quality time with my faithful journal, or maybe just that the good 'ole days of xanga are too far gone....but lately I have really missed writing.
Not necessarily writing anything of importance like research papers or anything like that...which I do miss. I know that's weird. It's maybe that I feel like I never get alone time for myself and my head to just sit and think and be. Is that weird? Maybe. It's probably weirder because if I'm putting my head and thoughts onto....keyboard....and onto the World Wide Web, it is no longer just for myself. But I think better when typing, so I suppose that's a risk I am willing to take. That's assuming of course that someone will read this, which let's be honest, is not likely. Whew.
Six months since I have graduated college. WOW. That's odd. Time flies when you are totally busy and sometimes stressed and occasionally overwhelmed with life and its goodness and fullness and sometimes loneliness. These last few months have been some of the hardest yet most beautiful months of my life.
Let's see.....May 2 changed a lot of things. I walked across the stage and into the happy embrace of Dr. Bob E. Riley as he told me congratulations on completing 4 years at "EDBU." As a freshman, nobody prepares you for what happens to you on that day. You go through 4 years minus one day of laughter, community, sorrow, homework, nasty cafeteria food, growing time, stupid time, and Intramural Championships (what what!) and then the last day all of a sudden....it.is.over.
All of the community that you worked so hard at, cried for, yelled about, smiled because of....all of that is gone. Sure you are still friends and you text every few days and there's the occasional random phone call. But it's never the same, not like that. I left school and came to Combine, Texas. WHERE? That's right. Combine. Middle of nowhere. No more late night runs to Whataburger or IHOP. No more hearing my roommates scream and laugh and fight and run around the apartment dressed very inappropriately. No more crying over the Father breaking us, or crying over the Father blessing us, or crying over Marley and Me or watching Twilight 10 times in one week. It's so different. And though the last 6 months the Lord has blessed me with another kind of community that has been very very sweet, I miss that community. And knowing that it will never be back the way that it was? Well that's enough to cry again.
But, thank the Father for his provision and his community. It's been so great getting to live at home before I get married and become one flesh with John. Spending time with mom and my brother and seeing my siblings more often....so good. So sweet. The Lord has shown me more and more the blessing of family and treasuring those moments and time together. I take them for granted far too often. Father forgive me! I realize more and more how selfish I sometimes am when I am with my family...so comfortable. Not taking a second to really talk to them, invest in them. Ah! Conviction.
John is a testimony to the faithfulness, abundance, provision, and LOVE of our Father. I mean, really. It is so neat to actually see the person that you have prayed for your whole life. The Lord constantly teaches me through John...sharpening me, convicting me, encouraging me, loving me, pursuing me. It is marvelous. Truly marvelous that my heavenly Father loves me so much that he would choose to love me through John the way that he does. Wow! So neat. I am blessed and grateful and honored that in less than two months I can call him my husband. He is leader, I am helper, and together we have the awesome gift and responsibility of showing the world a picture of the Gospel. The love of Christ for his bride, the church. I am humbled at this opportunity and calling Lord, please use us as one for Your glory.
Wow. That felt good.
I knew something had been missing.
Keyboard, it's nice to feel you, old friend.
Not necessarily writing anything of importance like research papers or anything like that...which I do miss. I know that's weird. It's maybe that I feel like I never get alone time for myself and my head to just sit and think and be. Is that weird? Maybe. It's probably weirder because if I'm putting my head and thoughts onto....keyboard....and onto the World Wide Web, it is no longer just for myself. But I think better when typing, so I suppose that's a risk I am willing to take. That's assuming of course that someone will read this, which let's be honest, is not likely. Whew.
Six months since I have graduated college. WOW. That's odd. Time flies when you are totally busy and sometimes stressed and occasionally overwhelmed with life and its goodness and fullness and sometimes loneliness. These last few months have been some of the hardest yet most beautiful months of my life.
Let's see.....May 2 changed a lot of things. I walked across the stage and into the happy embrace of Dr. Bob E. Riley as he told me congratulations on completing 4 years at "EDBU." As a freshman, nobody prepares you for what happens to you on that day. You go through 4 years minus one day of laughter, community, sorrow, homework, nasty cafeteria food, growing time, stupid time, and Intramural Championships (what what!) and then the last day all of a sudden....it.is.over.
All of the community that you worked so hard at, cried for, yelled about, smiled because of....all of that is gone. Sure you are still friends and you text every few days and there's the occasional random phone call. But it's never the same, not like that. I left school and came to Combine, Texas. WHERE? That's right. Combine. Middle of nowhere. No more late night runs to Whataburger or IHOP. No more hearing my roommates scream and laugh and fight and run around the apartment dressed very inappropriately. No more crying over the Father breaking us, or crying over the Father blessing us, or crying over Marley and Me or watching Twilight 10 times in one week. It's so different. And though the last 6 months the Lord has blessed me with another kind of community that has been very very sweet, I miss that community. And knowing that it will never be back the way that it was? Well that's enough to cry again.
But, thank the Father for his provision and his community. It's been so great getting to live at home before I get married and become one flesh with John. Spending time with mom and my brother and seeing my siblings more often....so good. So sweet. The Lord has shown me more and more the blessing of family and treasuring those moments and time together. I take them for granted far too often. Father forgive me! I realize more and more how selfish I sometimes am when I am with my family...so comfortable. Not taking a second to really talk to them, invest in them. Ah! Conviction.
John is a testimony to the faithfulness, abundance, provision, and LOVE of our Father. I mean, really. It is so neat to actually see the person that you have prayed for your whole life. The Lord constantly teaches me through John...sharpening me, convicting me, encouraging me, loving me, pursuing me. It is marvelous. Truly marvelous that my heavenly Father loves me so much that he would choose to love me through John the way that he does. Wow! So neat. I am blessed and grateful and honored that in less than two months I can call him my husband. He is leader, I am helper, and together we have the awesome gift and responsibility of showing the world a picture of the Gospel. The love of Christ for his bride, the church. I am humbled at this opportunity and calling Lord, please use us as one for Your glory.
Wow. That felt good.
I knew something had been missing.
Keyboard, it's nice to feel you, old friend.
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